I tenderly touched my stomach, caressed my middle and smiled sweetly and said
"Damn, I gotta get to the gym".
What really happened in that quiet moment was really a command center of crazies finding out they were under attack. They were yelling out things like "tell her to F off!" "Be sweet and tell her your waiting!" "make a funny joke!" "Pretend you didn't hear her!" "Change the subject!" "Be a bitch and tell her you can't!" "Pull the God card and tell her to pray for you" "break down in tears!" "Don't cry!" "Stare her down and remind yourself later to delete her number!"
Apparently the joke station's representative had their Wheaties that morning.
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